Sunday, October 16, 2005

Someone is upset with me

I know, I know. I haven't posted in like....ages. But have been extremely busy.

What prompted today to finally log on and post is the fact that I've done something terribly wrong and hence hurt a friend...a very dear friend. Wouldn't want to name her...yes, its a her, but not "her". "She" is away, off to Tirupati for a quick visit. However, the friend that I've upset has every reason to be. The only problem is, she is one of the very few close friends that I've made after coming to this B-school.

Perhaps I'm posting this blog in the hope that someday in the future she'll go through this blog and know how upset I am with myself. One doesn't find good friends easily, and those that you do should be taken extra care of... period. Even Shakespeare wrote so; refer to Polonius' advice to Laertes in "Hamlet".

Anyway, I've never been this upset with myself at having hurt a friend, because, in my memory, this is the first time I've ever hurt a friend. And it is bad. Never been in a more pathetic situation. Soon after I realised my mistake, it was difficult to even muster up the courage to go and stand in front of her. For the last two days, during the HR conclave, I've been catching glimpses of her...either while she's having lunch in the mess or in the auditorium while the presentations are being made. When alone, she seems upset and lonely, which scares me further from approaching her..what if she gets even more upset ? And when she's talking or laughing in someone else's company, I'm scared I'll ruin her mood.

God !! Am I thinking too much on this issue ? Or should I just brush the matter off ? Should I do something about it ? I've already apologised, in fact, also sent a mail to a particular authority that I'd earlier thought I wouldn't (although, haven't told her this yet). But will all this help mend the bridges ? Kya hamaari dosti phir pehle jaisi ho jayegi... Keep your fingers crossed, I know mine are.


Leo said...

All the Best......The greatest gify u give anybody is your time...coz when u give ur time .. u r actually giving a protion of ur life u would never get back

Shekhar said...

Thanks leo. I hope it works out. And like you said, I'm sure going to give her more of my time, but not in the moaning Dilip Kumar "Dil diya dard liya" style. I've just decided I'll try to be the crazy, but good, friend that I was with her.

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